So today was one of those days I was in my head the entire day. Is
that a good thing you ask? It depends on what’s renting space at the moment or
living for free. I’ve had like I don’t know 67 emotions on heavy rotation today. It was a whirlwind cocktail of all the
emotions you can think of, nostalgia, disappointment, anger, sadness, hope, laughter
you name them.
My day actually started out fine, have you ever just been
singing in the mirror looking for what to wear for the day or just going about
your day and then BAM! A thought just ambushes you, and not a good thought. And
it literally changes your whole mood, you feel the exact same feeling when that
particular thing was happening...and u feel so bad in ur heart waaah :-(
And so I always try to just stop the negative thinking but
sometimes it’s so strong so u have to pray and ask God to just help u then wait
it out. And it just got me thinking how sometimes it doesn’t really matter what
you do, part of life is being disappointed, even by people you never expect…to
be quite honest I don’t even feel like writing but I said I’ll share because
someone else might be going through the same thing.
It’s one thing to put effort and try out something and not
get it. Granted there could be many reasons that are even beyond you or even
someone else being better than you, and you have to accept that which means you
have to double your effort. I am all for that. But then for situations where
someone else tries to make you feel like you don’t deserve it or tell you in
short that there’s no room for you, meaning it’s only for them or their kind, I
don’t even know what kind that is. I’m sure you know what I mean. That’s plain
nasty.
But the thing is it’s a different kind of feeling when all
along you think something is being done only to find out that it never even
crossed over to where it was meant to go. And it got me thinking that human
beings really can be selfish. And they never want you to call them out for it.
You try to follow up and they become militant and defensive. I believe anyone
can be who and what they wanna be! Whether you wanna help or not it’s not in
your place to decide what other people deserve. Just because you got to where
you are first doesn’t mean no one should try or look down upon others who are
trying. And I have noticed it happens Alooooot esp to people who are trying out new ventures..
No one wants to give you any info even though it has
absolutely nothing to do with what they do or will ever do. You will be
surprised even so called friends act like you know I wish you all the best just
don’t involve me or ask me anything. Basically just being a dog in a manger. And
so for me I believe try try and try even though its gonna be blood, sweat and
tears because one day it will all be worth it. For those ones who wanna shut
you down or think you are being ridiculous for following your dream or just
think you are not good enough, pay them no mind and as painful as it maybe,
trust me it’s always worth it in the end. So this is to everyone who is
struggling and has been made to feel they are less than stellar..keep your eyes
on the prize.
And this week I learnt the true meaning of PERSISTENCE .
If you want something fight for it, you might not get it easy like some people
do but in the end if you persist you will get it.
I also learnt nothing is impossible, you may meet people
who put road blocks just because they think you are getting off easy and didn’t
go through what they went through, which really doesn’t make sense.
Because really you don’t know what someone has gone
through to be at that particular point.. If you meet people who wanna help
thank God for them, because good help doesn’t come easy. For those who don’t want
to help let them be. Nobody is ever a one all end all anywhere. Anyone can tell you or promise you anything but very few actually do it or back up their words.They'll just pay you lip service to make themselves look good.
I learnt the true meaning of friendship, when you have a
friend who stands by you through thick and thin, returning the favour is a
pleasure and a joy.
So talking out of experience I would love to encourage
the discouraged, coz I find myself in that funk sometimes. If you want something don’t
stop at nothing, in the end its always worth it. Plus it makes you appreciate
the effort and for me It makes me never wanna be like the people who disappoint you just
because it’s you.. and they think its ok, because she’ll get over it. It makes
me wanna assist where I got stuck and someone else assisted. Thanks for those
who take time to read my blog, have a lovely weekend.
Love
XO
ReNa
XO
ReNa
